Dear cookie eaters from around the world,

It’s that time of year again where we Gingers have to remind you that Gingerbread is offensive. As Gingers (yes, please capitalize it) it has come to our attention that people still insist on using the term “Gingerbread men,” and we feel it is our job to educate you on the meaning behind the term. Don’t expect us to sugarcoat it either.

First of all, as not all Gingers are men, the term “Ginger bread man” is exclusive and derogatory. Leaving out half of the population is dangerous and harmful. Women are an important part of society. Women are able to do everything men can do and they should have their own cookie.  Furthermore, Gingers come in all shapes and sizes. We are short, tall, skinny, fat, toned, tan, pale, but most important of all, we are Gingers!

When you relegate an entire group of people to a singular shape you damage the individual. Gingers do not all fit the mold that has been force on us. Trying to fit a mold is damaging to those who never will be able to. What about the disabled who do not have both arms or legs? Everyone knows the stereotypical Gingerbread cookie has one head, two legs, and two arms. The reality of the situation is this: “We will never all fit the mold. Get over it.”  

Additionally, using the term “Ginger Bread man” helps perpetuate the harmful stereotypes against Gingers. Treatment such as “ kick a Ginger day,” and shaming Gingers as “soulless” allows people to, even unwittingly or jokingly, oppress and put down Gingers as second-class citizens. #BreadLivesMatter yeah

And another thing, Gingerbread is only popular around Christmas time. It is clear that most people do not truly enjoy this treat and only pretend they do to pander to those of us who are gingerly-inclined. No one makes Gingerbread cookies in May. This blatant act of prejudice based on time period is disgusting and those who participate in it should be ashamed.

What message are we sending our Ginger children when their namesake cookie is only served during one month out of the year? What do we tell our Ginger grandparents when they ask if the world will ever be truly accepting to us and not just pay lip service to the idea of inclusion?

Finally, the very idea of Gingerbread houses suggests that Gingers have to be put in segregated housing. When we as a society have entire parties dedicated to building housing specifically for Gingers, how do we expect Gingers to feel welcomed and included? Companies make kits exclusively for this purpose, showcasing just how much potential capitalism has for division. Profiting off of this kind of segregation cannot be allowed to continue. Gingers are taking a stand and saying, “No more!”

For too long the tyranny of society and normalized hair colors have kept us out. Our hair color is not your cookie! Furthermore, we are requesting that since the Ginger cookie does not actually match the real Ginger color, they should no longer be allowed to be called Ginger.

Instead, the term “spice cookie” should be used. “Gingerbread-men” should be outlawed. The term “spice people” will work instead. And if you don’t like it well, that’s just how the cookie crumbles.

 

Signed, the Gingers of Lone Conservative

Matt Noyes is a New Hampshire native and currently works and lives in Tokyo, Japan. He is driven by a passion for liberty to take part in civic discourse. He holds a bachelors degree from SUNY Albany where he founded a Turning Point USA chapter and wrote for Campus Reform and the Albany Student Press.

The views expressed in this article are the opinion of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of Lone Conservative staff.


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About Matthew Noyes

SUNY Albany

Matt Noyes is a New Hampshire native and currently works and lives in Tokyo, Japan. He is driven by a passion for liberty to take part in civic discourse. He holds a bachelors degree from SUNY Albany where he founded a Turning Point USA chapter and wrote for Campus Reform and the Albany Student Press.

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